{"id":44807,"date":"2023-10-02T16:23:17","date_gmt":"2023-10-02T20:23:17","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.umw.edu\/lcpw\/?p=44807"},"modified":"2023-10-02T16:23:17","modified_gmt":"2023-10-02T20:23:17","slug":"joy-and-the-art-of-intentional-spontaneity","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.umw.edu\/lcpw\/2023\/10\/02\/joy-and-the-art-of-intentional-spontaneity\/","title":{"rendered":"Joy and the Art of Intentional Spontaneity"},"content":{"rendered":"<p><em>by Beth Williams, Executive Director for Human Resources, University of Mary Washington<\/em><\/p>\n<p>\u201cHey, I know it\u2019s super last minute, but \u2026\u201d\u00a0\u00a0 Thus began a text I received one morning at work a few weeks ago.\u00a0 A friend of mine was extending an invitation to see a band from the 80\u2019s &#8211; my high<img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" id=\"longdesc-return-44808\" class=\"alignright size-medium wp-image-44808\" src=\"https:\/\/www.umw.edu\/lcpw\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/21\/2023\/10\/audience--300x200.jpg\" alt=\"people in a crowd watching a band play on stage.\" width=\"300\" height=\"200\" longdesc=\"https:\/\/www.umw.edu\/lcpw?longdesc=44808&amp;referrer=44807\" srcset=\"\/\/www.umw.edu\/lcpw\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/21\/2023\/10\/audience--300x200.jpg 300w, \/\/www.umw.edu\/lcpw\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/21\/2023\/10\/audience--1024x682.jpg 1024w, \/\/www.umw.edu\/lcpw\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/21\/2023\/10\/audience--768x512.jpg 768w, \/\/www.umw.edu\/lcpw\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/21\/2023\/10\/audience--680x453.jpg 680w, \/\/www.umw.edu\/lcpw\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/21\/2023\/10\/audience--1140x760.jpg 1140w, \/\/www.umw.edu\/lcpw\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/21\/2023\/10\/audience-.jpg 1280w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 300px) 100vw, 300px\" \/> school days and the best music decade, ever!\u00a0\u00a0 The concert was that same night in DC and the band was none other than Duran Duran (if you know, you know).\u00a0 I love live music, but I\u2019m not a big concert-goer; nonetheless, for about a week I had been seeing Facebook posts about their current tour and what a spectacular show they still put on.\u00a0 Maybe it was nostalgia, or just the fact that such a <em>seasoned<\/em> band was still packing huge arenas and putting on a killer show, but I had been experiencing a bit of uncharacteristic FOMO.<\/p>\n<p>Fast forward to the last minute invitation from my friend \u2013 I don\u2019t typically do last minute, but geez, an extra <em>free<\/em> ticket to that very concert, <strong>and<\/strong> someone else was providing the transportation\u2026 it felt like the universe was urging me to go!\u00a0 So what was my initial reaction to the invitation? Total ambivalence.\u00a0 What?! Why?!\u00a0 Well, I told myself, \u201cyou are a responsible professional\u201d, and proceeded to mentally list all the reasons I shouldn\u2019t go:<\/p>\n<ul>\n<li>It\u2019s Wednesday, the middle of the workweek!<\/li>\n<li>I\u2019d have to leave work by 2:30, which I hadn\u2019t planned for.<\/li>\n<li>We wouldn\u2019t get home until after midnight and I have work tomorrow!<\/li>\n<li>I don\u2019t want my staff to feel like I\u2019m skipping out on them.<\/li>\n<li>I don\u2019t want to be seen as shirking my duties.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p>Earlier in my life, I may have stopped there and allowed my hyper-critical self to talk me out of going.\u00a0 However, with age comes perspective and a bit of wisdom.\u00a0 I was being presented with this prime opportunity to do something I knew I\u2019d really enjoy and would likely not have the opportunity to do again, so I allowed space to challenge my thinking and posed these questions:<\/p>\n<ul>\n<li>Will anything at work suffer if I leave a couple hours early? (hint: no)<\/li>\n<li>Which will I regret more, not going to the concert or leaving work a couple hours early?<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p>Those two thought-challenge questions brought immediate clarity and I committed to going to the concert. \u00a0<em>Those of you who have the gift of spontaneity are probably thinking \u201cwhat\u2019s with all the angst and analysis? Just go, already!\u201d\u00a0 I agree! However, those of us who tend to over-analyze and wrestle with hyper-critical self-talk usually have to talk ourselves into being spontaneous (weird, I know).<\/em>\u00a0\u00a0 The concert was AMAZING! We had a perfect night of dinner, drinks and dancing and the show was truly fabulous, as were my two concert buddies.\u00a0 I didn\u2019t worry about work at all. \u00a0And what of my initial \u201cconcerns\u201d? Let\u2019s see:<\/p>\n<ul>\n<li>It\u2019s Wednesday, the middle of the workweek! &#8211; <em>So what? <\/em><\/li>\n<li>I\u2019d have to leave work by 2:30, which I hadn\u2019t planned for. &#8211; <em>So? I still worked most of the day, had no urgent deadlines and no meetings scheduled the rest of the day. <\/em><\/li>\n<li>We wouldn\u2019t get home until after midnight and I have work tomorrow! &#8211; Y<em>eah, this is a bit more difficult at 51 and I knew I\u2019d be dragging the next day, but I survived.<\/em><\/li>\n<li>I don\u2019t want my staff to feel like I\u2019m skipping out on them. <em>\u2013 Not only was my team supportive, they were excited for me! This also allowed me to practice what I preach to them about work\/life balance and doing things that bring us joy.<\/em><\/li>\n<li>I don\u2019t want to be seen as shirking my duties. \u2013 <em>Everything was fine the next day and, as it turns out, absolutely no one thought I had suddenly turned into an irresponsible reprobate. <\/em><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p>No regrets!! For me, this experience was not only a great opportunity to make memories (and dance like the teenager I once was to the legendary Duran Duran), but also a lesson in what I have come to think of as <em>intentional spontaneity, <\/em>identifying more opportunities for fun (planned and unplanned) and saying yes to them more often.\u00a0 I hope we all continue to challenge our own self-critical thinking and limiting beliefs and embrace more opportunities to experience joy.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>by Beth Williams, Executive Director for Human Resources, University of Mary Washington \u201cHey, I know it\u2019s super last minute, but \u2026\u201d\u00a0\u00a0 Thus began a text I received one morning at work a few weeks ago.\u00a0 A friend of mine was extending an invitation to see a band from the 80\u2019s &#8211; my high school days [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":92,"featured_media":44808,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"umw_cb_additional_links":[[]],"_genesis_hide_title":false,"_genesis_hide_breadcrumbs":false,"_genesis_hide_singular_image":false,"_genesis_hide_footer_widgets":false,"_genesis_custom_body_class":"","_genesis_custom_post_class":"","_genesis_layout":"","jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_advisory_expires_time":"","_advisory_meta_include":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","_links_to":"","_links_to_target":""},"categories":[2],"tags":[],"class_list":{"0":"post-44807","1":"post","2":"type-post","3":"status-publish","4":"format-standard","5":"has-post-thumbnail","7":"category-blog","8":"entry"},"acf":[],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO Premium plugin v27.3 (Yoast SEO v27.3) - 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